I feel like I've hit a gold mine lately in poor headlines! Today's: Calf to Sideline Manny for at Least Three Weeks.
That's right, folks. After his much hype cross species MMA fight, Manny Ramirez is going to be sidelined for at least three weeks. Rump Roast, the five week old calf from Pasadena, California, answered the '80's question "Who's the Boss?" by taking down Manny in record time of 5.3 seconds.
When asked what happened, Manny replied, "Bulls*%t!!! No, literally, man. He pooped and it threw me off my game. Next thing I knew, he was all over me and I was done."
Showing posts with label Ramirez. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Ramirez. Show all posts
Players Want to be Scouted Still
Dylan Hernandez of the Los Angeles Times tweeted that the Tokyo Giants had a scout at the Dodgers-Cardinals game at Busch Stadium on Friday. When asked what he was doing there, the scout said a lot of things in Japanese that couldn't be translated, but probably was something like, "We like to look for new talent to improve our league. We hear there are fantastic players in this series, so we wanted to come out and see what they can do. We hear that Garrett Anderson may be looking for a new location because his talents haven't kept up with the professional baseball of the United States. That is exactly the type of big name we are looking for."
When he heard that the Tokyo Giants had a scout in the stands, Dodger OF Manny Ramirez seemed quite interested. "I never thought about playing in Japan. That could be pretty cool. I'm sure they'd give me another $20 million contract because I'm certainly not getting another one over here!"
When he heard that the Tokyo Giants had a scout in the stands, Dodger OF Manny Ramirez seemed quite interested. "I never thought about playing in Japan. That could be pretty cool. I'm sure they'd give me another $20 million contract because I'm certainly not getting another one over here!"
Papi's Eternal Well of Generosity Overflows
David Ortiz, or Big Papi as you may know him, won the annual display of long-ball prowess last night. Ortiz was tied with Hanley Ramirez at 21 each going into the final round, and then went off for 11 dingers in the final round. Hanley, who is used to being unable to finish things... like ground balls, put on quite a show to tie him with Papi and get into the finals, but then completely fell apart under the intense pressure of dozens of watchful fans.
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